Local Acupuncturist's Needle Precision Called Into Question After Accidentally Poking Wrong Pressure Points During Family Argument

WELLESLEY, MA — Local acupuncturist and mother of two Janette MacAusland came under fire this week after what neighbors are calling a 'catastrophic misunderstanding of Eastern medicine principles' during what should have been a routine family dispute resolution session.

MacAusland, who specializes in traditional Chinese medicine and has a 4.2-star Yelp rating, allegedly attempted to restore harmony to her household Friday evening using advanced pressure point techniques she learned during her certification course at the New England School of Wholistic Health.

'I just heard a lot of talk about meridians and life force energy coming from next door,' said neighbor Patricia Flemming, 58. 'Then it got really quiet, which I guess means the chakras were finally balanced?'

According to sources close to the family, MacAusland had been experimenting with increasingly aggressive wellness treatments as part of her ongoing divorce proceedings, including mandatory family meditation sessions and what she called 'therapeutic needle placement for behavioral modification.'

'She kept saying the kids' auras were all wrong and that Western parenting methods were disrupting their qi,' reported family friend Sandra Chen. 'I thought she just meant they needed more organic vegetables or something.'

The Wellesley Police Department's newly formed Alternative Medicine Incident Response Team is now investigating whether proper licensing requirements were followed during the alleged 'intensive healing session.'

'This is exactly why we need stricter regulation of the holistic healing industry,' said Chief Detective Mike Romano, while consulting his department's recently purchased 'Acupuncture for Law Enforcement' manual. 'You can't just go around redirecting people's life energy willy-nilly.'

MacAusland's attorney declined to comment, citing attorney-client privilege and his own general confusion about how acupuncture actually works.