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Local Man Who Still Has 47,000 Copies of Anti-Obama DVD Finally Finds New Purpose Filing Nanny-Related Immigration Complaints

By dedododo Staff4/13/20262 min read
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Local Man Who Still Has 47,000 Copies of Anti-Obama DVD Finally Finds New Purpose Filing Nanny-Related Immigration Complaints

WASHINGTON — Sources confirm that Joel Gilbert, the filmmaker whose 2012 mass mailing of anti-Barack Obama DVDs to swing-state voters was universally ignored, has found renewed purpose in life by filing immigration complaints about political figures' domestic staff.

"I knew my time would come again," said Gilbert, speaking from his garage office surrounded by towers of unsold "Dreams from My Real Father" DVDs that he continues to use as furniture. "After Obama left office, I thought my investigative career was over. Then I realized — politicians have nannies, and nannies have paperwork. It's like Christmas morning all over again."

Gilbert's latest target is Congressman Eric Swalwell, whose nanny Gilbert claims may have violated immigration law after conducting what he describes as "47 hours of intensive sidewalk surveillance" outside the congressman's residence.

"I've been watching that house like a hawk," Gilbert explained while adjusting his homemade periscope setup. "Last Tuesday, I saw the nanny arrive at 7:58 AM instead of 8:00 AM, which clearly indicates suspicious behavior patterns consistent with someone trying to work extra hours to send money back to... somewhere."

DHS officials confirmed they are investigating Gilbert's complaint, though sources describe the 847-page submission as "mostly crayon drawings of stick figures with question marks over their heads" and "a surprisingly detailed analysis of the family's garbage sorting habits."

Gilbert says he plans to expand his nanny investigation network nationwide, having already recruited his neighbor's teenage son and two retired crossing guards to help monitor congressional districts.

"This is just the beginning," Gilbert declared, accidentally knocking over a stack of DVDs. "Every politician in America better make sure their childcare workers have their paperwork in order, because Joel Gilbert is watching. Also, does anyone want to buy some documentaries? I'll throw in free shipping."

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