Trump's Approval Rating Falls So Low It Technically Becomes a Geological Formation

WASHINGTON — In what geologists are calling "an unprecedented meteorological event," President Donald Trump's approval rating has fallen so catastrophically low that it has literally burrowed through the Earth's crust and established itself as a new subterranean cave network beneath the White House lawn.
The dramatic plunge, triggered by his recent "Operation Epic Fury" military campaign against Iran — which sources confirm involved Trump personally challenging the entire Iranian military to a dance-off — has left pollsters scrambling to invent new mathematical concepts to measure negative approval.
"We've had to hire a team of spelunkers just to find where his numbers went," said Gallup pollster Margaret Henderson, adjusting her mining helmet. "Last we checked, his approval rating was somewhere near the Earth's core, possibly making friends with some very surprised mole people."
The cave system, now officially designated as "Trump Disapproval National Monument," has become an unexpected tourist attraction. Visitors report hearing faint echoes of tweets bouncing off the cavern walls and the distant sound of someone insisting the cave is actually "the most beautiful, tremendous cave, probably the best cave in history."
Geologists estimate that Trump's approval rating is currently at -847%, a number so mathematically impossible that it has caused three calculators to file for early retirement and seek therapy.
When reached for comment, Trump declared the cave system "fake news" and claimed his approval rating was actually "through the roof," technically correct since it had indeed passed through the White House roof on its way to the planet's mantle.