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Rogue Seagull Steals Starting Pistol At Tri-County Swim Meet, Meet Director Describes Scene As 'Basically A War Zone'

By dedododo Staff6/9/20263 min read
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Rogue Seagull Steals Starting Pistol At Tri-County Swim Meet, Meet Director Describes Scene As 'Basically A War Zone'

MILLHAVEN TOWNSHIP — Authorities are asking residents to remain calm and avoid unnecessary travel to Eisenhower Regional High School this Saturday after officials confirmed that a pigeon — believed to be the same bird responsible for the 2022 and 2023 disruptions — has returned to Lane 4 of the school's outdoor track, placing the entire Regional 400-Meter Finals in what Millhaven Athletic Director Ron Puddifer is calling 'a very real state of jeopardy.'

'We are taking this extremely seriously,' said Puddifer, speaking from behind a folding table at a press conference attended by eleven parents, one local reporter, and a woman who wandered in looking for the bathroom. 'This is not a drill. This is a bird situation, and we are activating our bird situation protocols.'

The pigeon, whom students have named Gerald, first appeared on the track in May 2022, causing a 47-minute delay when he refused to vacate Lane 4 during the boys' semifinal heat. He returned in 2023, this time bringing what track officials described as 'a companion of unclear intent.' Both incidents were ultimately resolved when a custodian named Dale waved a broom in Gerald's general direction.

Dale has since retired.

'We no longer have Dale,' Puddifer confirmed, visibly emotional. 'And that is something this community is going to have to sit with.'

Millhaven Township has issued a formal Public Safety Alert advising spectators attending Saturday's meet to avoid making direct eye contact with any birds in the vicinity, refrain from consuming seed-based snacks in the bleacher area, and 'please, for the love of God, do not encourage him.'

Dr. Patricia Vonn, an ornithologist at the Greater Millhaven Community College Extension Program, told Channel 4 News that Gerald's behavior is consistent with what she calls 'territorial athletic encroachment,' a phenomenon she has personally witnessed twice and written one blog post about.

'The bird has clearly identified Lane 4 as his domain,' said Dr. Vonn, gesturing at a printed photo of the track she had laminated herself. 'From a behavioral standpoint, he is not being aggressive. He is simply standing there, which is somehow worse.'

Several qualifying athletes say the recurring delays have taken a measurable psychological toll. Junior sprinter Brayden Kutz, who has trained for this event since the eighth grade, described the situation as 'honestly kind of a lot.'

'I've worked really hard,' said Kutz, staring into the middle distance. 'And there's just a pigeon. Every year. In my lane.'

Regional officials say they are exploring a range of solutions, including relocating the race to Lane 5, hiring a licensed wildlife removal specialist, or, as one school board member suggested during Tuesday's emergency session, 'just letting the bird run and seeing what happens.'

That proposal was tabled pending legal review.

The meet is currently scheduled to begin at 10 a.m. Saturday, weather permitting, pigeon permitting, and assuming the broom situation can be resolved. Authorities remind residents that this is an evolving situation and updates will be provided as they become available.

'We want Millhaven to know we have this under control,' Puddifer said, before pausing for a long moment. 'We are working very hard to have this under control.'

Channel 4 will provide live coverage.

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